During my stay in South Korea, I tried to stopover and tour as many countries as I could whenever I get the chance to travel back to Malaysia.
So far I've been to Japan, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, New Zealand and I've never wanted to go out when I stopover in Taipei or Hong Kong.
There's just no urge to go to a Chinese based country.

I had been eyeing China for a long time but I had never tried hard enough to go there, a part of me somehow didn't like it that much. (Despite being a Malaysian-chinese)

When Laiyee and I booked our tiks to China, we didn't plan much, we were fooling around wasting time, totally unprepared for the China trip.
Maybe both of us weren't that into China afterall.

I was actually craving for Malaysia and with my parents being god-damned worried about our 18-day-trip, I secretly hoped that the 18 days would pass faster.

It's too bad I cannot access blogger in China, I felt loads when I was there, and I was dying to write. Nah. Not now, just transfered the piccas into the comp, I'll tell the story when I'm inspired to write.
Goodnight world.

ps: I'm kinda amazed with how abruptly I can end my blog posts. Selfish writer, not considering the feelings of readers at all. -_-

18 days in China.

I promise I will expect the unexpected and I will come back safe and sound, in one piece.
I've made my decisions after seriously considering the countable risks.
I have only one life to live and I want to enjoy it.

Hopefully, the next trip I make, I'm with a trustworthy guy that I can depend on, rely on.
Somebody that solves my problems, somebody there to hear me out, somebody to make me feel safe.

I love YOU
papa, mama, koko, erke.

And the any you that is reading this.
The you that read my whole blog and try understanding me.
The you that even try catching what I mean in between the lines.

I love you. ♥

I'm a tough cookie not because I want to.
Because if I break down who's there to put back the broken pieces?

a little more heart
a little less head

a litte more open
a little less cautious

Sometimes, I'm amazed. I'm amazed by the audacity in me to act totally random.
Many around me told me that they are baffled by my courage, my boldness.
But goodness me, I don't think that boldness and blind bravery is gonna get me anywhere far.
More than once, I've regretted acting on impulse.
Lucky me I'm still in my twenties, I wonder what's it gonna be like when I'm in my thirties. More or less the same me I suppose.

My new year resolution was to use this whole year to grow up, to prepare myself for the world, the working society.
Somehow that's not working too well.
I'm so loving the me that still acts kiddish. The me that's still "kekekeke" happy and well most of the time sampat.

Arrrrrr. When am I suppose to grow up?

What I miss most right now is the twinkling sea of stars where I can see em' only back in Chendering.

I'm learning everyday to be less judgemental and more thankful to have angels sent into my life to beautify it.

It is antonishing how rare beauty and purity wins over in a world so brutally realistic.

Thank You, you, you, you, you and you and you for always being there.

I was in the subway on Sunday morning heading to kbs.
Life has been super hectic lately with experiments in the lab, team projects, exams and shootings, and job hunting. The stress just piled up higher and higher, and maybe because I was sick, and I didn't go home this winter (when everybody did), didn't celebrate all the special days with my love ones, and all the most important people in my life is there, and because I didn't get to eat all the food I wanna eat, and I don't get to hug my dog...
I was overwhelmed with emotions. Homesickness.

And let me tell you people. This is when we overseas students grow up.
And YES. It still happens after six years.
And YES. I know I'm god damned lucky I'm here.
And YES. I'm thankful for everything I've already got.

The thing is when you don't get to share special moments with your family. You miss birthdays, anniversaries, everything.
When you just can’t be there, when you’re needed.
When you have to conceal what you're actually feeling to them.
When you try to convince yourself that it is all for the better.
When you're sorry but you know if you tell them you are, it would make them feel worse.

And when you hear your parents telling you they are learning to "let go", it is heart wrenching.
And when you look around and see all your peers (the Korean friends) going back "home", you just feel this pang of jealously. Seriously.

In that subway, what I saw was a girl, my age with her mom.
Her mom was trying to feed her something and she pushed her mom's hand away. Certainly not ill-manneredly, just a little frustrated maybe. I do that to mummy too sometimes, but at that point of time, I was so madly jealous of how blissful the whole picture looked to me and I tried to look away, I tried to calm myself down but the babi tears just sprung outta my eyes.

Those Korean ajoshi ajumma must think I'm crazy or that I just went through a bad break up or whatever bah. Thank goodness I was only two stops from my destination.

Babi bad mood but I'm all good now.
Bye.
Thanks for reading up to here.
I admire your patience.