Letting go, is never an easy thing to do.
But when the time comes, we just gotta do it.


I've almost always get anything I've wanted.
Letting go was never an option for me to choose.

Now,
I'm letting go of something I almost had but will never have.
Just felt like I can't stand another 'no', and because of that I don't really feel the need to move on.
Gotta stop being protected by people around me, and learn to live life the hard way.

Something for laughs. Click the pic down there. I swear you won't regret it!
Got through all the trouble by downloading the file, printscreened it and then deleted the whole power-point right after I got just this 'one' slide.

This is what I learned in my physics class last week. 'If you suck like a vacuum, uh.. it will go up!'
LMAO!!!!!! That was sooooo hilarious!
All of us were like holding our stomachs trying real hard to muffle our laughters.
But it was obvious that we found this particular slide amusing.
And my korean lecturer took another look at the slide and said, "Oh, suck..."
My guess is, he didn't really get why we were mad with laughter and thought we were laughing at the "suxs" word.
Trust me, that's the first and only time I enjoyed that lecturer's class.

Call me a cry baby,
I tear when I quarrel with someone,
I tear when erke said something really hurtful,
I tear when I quarrel with my erke,
I tear when the door was slammed in my face,
I tear when my chair broke down,
I tear when I received another no, another disappointment,
I tear when my phone got banged up,
I tear when my koko told me I got my mom upset, sitting on the sofa at 5am worrying about me,
I tear when my koko told me he love me,
I tear when I'm blogging.
Instead of being cool-headed, I tear, when I'm alone.

Call me crazy, call me emo, call me 'lack of attention', call me freak. I just can't help it.

Always thought my eldest koko don't really give a damn about me, just treating me like a kid.
Always thought my second erke really give a rats ass about me, treating me like someone with a brain.
Now,
It's totally the opposite. My koko trust me to make decisions, he guides, he tells me, but never did he instruct me.

My erke, I always thought of him closer to me than anybody on earth would ever be. I thought the world of him. And I know he loves me.
But he does not show me the respect that I deserve, and he thinks that me blogging here is an 'uncool' thing. Thinking that I should cut my ties with some people that he considers as 'nerds'. And when I do things 'my way' and if it displeases him. He stash out and put me down, in front of everyone, almost anyone. I guess he still don't know that his lil pet sister is starting to have a mind of her own. A life of her own. And it is time to respect the decisions I make. But, I'm not saying I'm all grown up and mature, because I did let my anger get the better of me. And I did make my mom stay up worrying about me. And I'm not proud of that. And I just wish she knows how sorry I am.

My koko, being the eldest, played his part real well in this whole scenario,
With him, u gotta just cut the crap and make him understand your situation, that's all. You gotta stop all the bitching and complains. Because he is just a really cool person. Cool but never cold.
And he offer not much comforting words. Just a few small advice coated with the 'f-word', maybe to express his authority as the eldest? =P
But if u read between the lines, u may feel the unseen care and love there.
And when you tell him you love him. He totally melts even though he does not show it.
It's just that I can feel it. And I know u gonna read this. Just admit it, your darling lil sis has her ways to make you adore her despite her being a noisy, hard-headed brat.
He ends his conversation with asking me to take care (cooly). But little did he know that he just made me tear again.

Love ya, ALL.

If you wanna eat supper at nite, don't find meiping, laiyee or viona or any girls.
They are scare if they will grow fat.
Especially when, you suggest fried chicken for supper.

Find didi, cause he will teman u do jiwang, crazy stuff. And he will tell u that, "Actually I not yet eat my dinner..." and, he will also remind u not to wear something "mini". Must wear thicker.
Wearing my bulky jacket, a hat and a scarf that wasn't matching at all, he and I ate our warm warm chicken on the beam of a bridge with bright yellow lights shining down. And "thong thong" sounds of vehicles above our heads.
It was 11 degrees celcius. Nice!~
hehehehehehe..


Suddenly,
a policeman came up to us, (he reminded me of those tangkap khalwat ppl in malaysia. ==)
asking if we've seen anybody jumping into the river.
Didi said, there might be a corpse around there and demanded to get outta there immediately, which I obediently followed.
Ended up eating at the top of the stairs. There was no corpse. Just chicken. Mmmm.. nice.

To those who are wondering whether I'm alive...
Yes I am! ^^ muah..~
And to the question why I don't update my life...
It's because I finally have a life after my exams and I'm too busy to update my blog.

So, what got me updating now?!
I'm just so pissed with somebody now I wish I can do all these to him!!!!!!!!


Calling me "fucker" right after I bought and brought his damned supper to his room!!! And after making me wait more than 15 minutes for the new episode of heroes!

I so wish I can stab him in the head just like this!

And may his blood splutter all over the place!!!!
I don't fucking give a damn.

Edited photo removed by administrator (according to my mom it's a bad thing to do==)
Ahh... I feel so much better now..~
Time for bed~

Lesson learned by readers. Don't call khay inn a fucker. Plus I don't have a dick, how can I fuck?!
Go fuck yourself if u happen to read this. And I will never delete this post!
If you're thinking that I'm being childish, so what? Who cares? =P
I soooooo! enjoy editing that photo. muahhh~