Learning to let go..

of things that were never meant to be.
of people that were never meant to stay.
of relationships that were never meant to work.
of promises that were never meant to be kept.
:) :) :) :) :) :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2010 will be a year full of great promises.

The reason why I don't need a boyfriend...

...is because I have too many boy-friends.

Maybe it's due to the fact that I'm in Engineering Faculty and the ratio of guys to girl is 5:1 so...

Somehow, life in Korea got better because of them.



My 4.5 genius friend, who is ever ready to teach the three of us although he doesn't understand how can we not know simple differentiation and integration; when, we are actually engineering students. -_- He's having the flu now and somehow, the three of us fuss over him like mothers fussing over a kid. ^___________^



태헌오빠 who looks like fido-dido and will always grab whatever food or drink that's in your hands. His head is forever full of "source" and "기출" ( pass year exam papers) -_-
and 대성 오빠 who looks like snoopppppppyyyyy! ^^ He's super soft and when he smiles, his very small eyes goes n_n, that makes him look superrrr cute!!


용준 and 지호
arr 지호 is super nice and blurry.
Nowadays, it seems my day in school ain't complete if I don't see any of em... ^^

Thanks for making my each hardly bearable day, an immensely enjoyable one.
♥

I'm never one with high self confidence and sometimes if I do appear like I have that air of confidence, most of the time, I think, I'm just faking it.

Growing up, I always think of myself more of an ugly duckling than anything. I don't dress up, I don't give a damn about how I look because it is much easier staying in that comfort zone. It is like, what if I dressed up and it didn't work?

I would rather be simple jane that stick to the "norm", than be told "Hey, did your wardrobe just went wrong?"
It is just so much easier to be normal than the outstanding.

So, there comes this transition period when I started wearing skirts, I started to have at least 10% of fashion sense. And when I get positive feedback and words of encouragement, it sparked my fashion sense to a higher 20 30 %. Whatever..

However, there are times, when I get adventurous and decided to dress up by wearing something out of nowhere to break that "being normal sweet pretty" barrier. Sometimes, it works and I feel good about myself, but sometimes, when the feedback isn't good, sometimes, when what I get is downright mean. It is hurtful. It puts me right back to the ugly ducking period where I feel so small, doubting my choices, questioning my own senses, and I will have this urge to seek approval from the others.

Then again I ponder on it, and I have this new found theory. We do not make all the right choices all the time. At least I broke through that barrier, that comfort zone. To pluck up to courage to break through that comfort zone is much more glamorous than those who hide in there deep in their comfort zone making snide comments to bring me down.
So, I decided that no amount of mean hurtful words are gonna stop me enjoying being this wonderfully special me.

Ps: Again, if you have something not to nice to say, keep it to yourself, for my self-esteem's sake I prefer to be blissfully unaware of it.

qi...
Help me..

I spend so much time in hase nowadays I feel like I'm totally koreanized.

To proof to you how koreanized I am... I actually sang 머리부터 발끝까지 헛 이슈 when I was in the shower... ㅡㅅㅡ

and... My biggest fear...

I voluntarily called people 오빠... ㅠㅠ

But..
Somehow, I started to enjoy my life here and I actually really love it here.

Maybe it's the friends, maybe it's the food, maybe it's just me that have changed.

Life is a bliss lately. I hope it stays this way forever.
If you're just a year younger we coulda go roam around anam hunting for new food.
Ps: I love prof. song.
Ps Ps: Issac kene replaced by OST d.

nana, "OST took away our ISSAC!!!"
laiyee, "YALAHHHHH Who needs OST when Issac is our main thing for breakfast."
Kinn, "Issac sucks. I don't give a damn. Never eaten there."

<3

Just to prove to myself and everybody else...

I'm still very much alive.
Very much the same me.
Healthy and happy. Although this picca shows no signs of
"hot", "sexy" or "sophisticated".

Keep your thoughts to yourselves if it isn't something nice and quit clicking the "comments" link.
The last thing I need is skepticism.

This post is dedicated to myself.
Celebrating all the single 21-year-old girls out there.

"went for a walk, saw people hands in hands, think that they are all pretty fucked up."
This was in my head when I clicked on "New Post" link. Very bitter.

I THINK RECENTLY I AM NOT A GOOD PERSON AND I HAVE A MONOTONOUS SIMPLE LIFE THAT IS NOT TOO WORTH SHARING AT THE MOMENT.

UNTIL I FIND A GOOD REASON TO STOP BLABBING ABOUT NOTHING, AND START WRITING SOMETHING INTERESTING TO SHARE, THIS IS THE END OF THIS BLOG.

BYE.

It's gonna be a picca-less long post but please please do read to the end.

Breakfast : Naturally woke up at 9am, literally forced myself back to dreamland till 12.45pm.

Lunch : Frozen pizza, I had four slices for last nite's dinner, another two slices for tomorrow.
After brunch, I perked up and pull the sheets off nana and laiyee's beds and did the laundry. Redecorated my wall and unpacked my luggage.
Felt so proud with myself and while waiting for my erke's call to go to Myeongdong together, watched '17 again'.
Called my erke at around 4.30pm asking him "Are we going to Myeongdong?". "Oh... I'm doing my suda thingy, tomorrow k...". Without feeling even an ounce of dulanness, I said "Ok."

5.00 pm : found a dead kitty right outside my front door. BAD OMEN!
5.30 pm : Called out Shafique to play tennis, ended up sitting on a bench talking for hours.

Dinner : Made some instant yaki-udon. Instant. -_- Watched 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button' and downed a big bar of chocolate. Mmmmm~~
Halfway through the movie I started youtube-ing "Britains got talent" when I got a mysterious call with no caller-ID at 9.30pm asking me to I translated eight Jesus songs from Korean to Malay for FREE -_-. And I did it. ( I feel so angelic after being nice to my erke, and taking care of the dead cat, and not translating for free!) -_-
I'm so gonna sit beside God in Heaven! (Taysueyen no matter what you say!)

1.30 am : Started chatting with taysueyen and ganjunqi. You girls certainly entertained my monotonous life.
2.20 am : Everyone wished me goodnite, so I painted my nails (finger and toe nails), and erased and repainted them.
2.50 am : Feeling very proud of myself for not losing my cool yet and decided to blog about my ALONE-time life while drinking some Baileys outta a wine glass (just to be more classy and feel better for myself).

This might seems like a very boring day to you. Well, to be honest, it wasn't all that interesting to blog about.
The thing is, I now know why I choose to come back to "empty Korea" when I could easily extend my ticket.
I wanted a break from having to juggle groups of people, I wanted to restrict myself from being the social butterfly with too many lunch and dinner dates, having to balance in between who to meet up with, who to eat with, who to go out with.
When I made the decision to come back earlier, I sorta decided that I want to be a nun.

You hear me right.

A quiet, independent, non-attention-seeking, pohkhayinn and I wanted to prove to myself that I can be a very independent and disipline person. And that I can live ALONE without any GUYS in my life.
Muahahaha. LAME, I know.

So far, my monotonous nunny life is going well and I never once feel boring YET.
However, the attention seeking me still enjoys chatting with ms. gan for some juicy gossip & drama. So much for being a nun. -_-
And I think I was about to create some drama in my life ( Yes, drama doesn't just appear outta thin air, we humans create them) until the kitty outside my house died this morning. BAD OMEN.

Reality kicked in and I refrained myself from indulging in any sort of drama. (Somehow I have a feeling only ms. gan knows what I'm crapping about.)
Whatever it is, I reckon I can't stand this nunny life for a month although right now I'm sorta enjoying it (Frozen pizza, drinking alone, and Harry Potter marathon. Literary everything about it).

I think I'm not destined to have a nunny life. I'm just for a while wanna turn into a quiet mysterious girl. -_______-
I was just obstinate enough to deny that I enjoy the dramas in life.
So. So.... Anybody reading up to here and if you are in Korea. And you don't mind calling me out to get to know me better. 010-5891-8910. ( Not in a boy-girl dating thing; I just need some interesting hang out friends)
I promise, I won't bite anybody's head off.